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Gut Wrench 08-25-17 10:59 PM

2017 Subsim Fantasy Football Reports
 
Here we go again skippers. Once more around the cape as we set sail for sixteen of the most frustrating weeks in make believe since we concluded the last sixteen weeks earlier this year. Will the Nighhawks go back to back? Will the Drunk Monkeys as the most under tendered team show up and get into the plays offs. Will this thread get a nomination in this years Best of Subsim , cause it's never too early to nominate. Will somebody please show the Gunners how not to lead the entire season and fall over in the last two weeks.

Yes, it's that time, as we go around the grounds in the

2017 SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL LEAGUE

We're just a little over twelve hours away form Draft Day, and our Commissioner has certainly picked a great spot. The USS Dallas.

http://www.maritimequest.com/warship...8_ssn770_a.jpg

The Dallas, easily the real protagonist of the film Hunt for Red October, is currently at berth. The Commissioner with his international connections to the White House, have managed to secure exclusive accommodations on board the Dallas. Each of the Coaches will be bunking down in the actual quarters of the vessel, but unlike naval voyages, there will be no hot bunking. The quarters have had several rows of beds removed and a number of commodities brought in to make life homily - beer tap, big screen television, a pin ball machine and a full time barista. Each Coach has their own unsecured quarters fitted with a team where they can conference with the "war room" of agents and spotters. The actual war room participants are housed outside.

On Draft Day, the Coaches will be using a modified periscope and game board to make their selections. Coaches will look down the periscope at a digital board of all the available players. Using the torpedo controls, when Coaches lock on to the players they want, they will fire a virtual torpedo and take the players off the board. On the shore, 200,000 fans will be gathered around a big screen monitor and will watch on a relayed broadcast, or whet the coaches see. Fans will be able to see Coaches go back and forth between players, and follow through as the virtual torpedoes are fired.

We'll be back early tomorrow morning as we get ready to make the first pick in the most exciting Fantasy Football Draft...since last year.

Gut Wrench 08-26-17 10:51 AM

2017 DRAFT DAY

...and the first pick of the draft goes to, The Guns of Hochuli.


Gut Wrench 09-04-17 04:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gut Wrench (Post 2508910)
2017 DRAFT DAY

...and the first pick of the draft goes to, The Guns of Hochuli.


2017 DRAFT DAY - Late News

Whoa.

So as most of you know, Texas, has a had a little water issue lately. The original Post on the Draft Day results was uploaded, but apparently, drowned.

So let's get back to the Review.

First pick of the draft by the Gunners, no surprises there, Running Back David Johnson. Once again, Coach Thad of the Drunk Monkeys was a No Show No Call...and the little prick still managed to end the draft with the best results. (How did that happen?)

There's been no movement in the week in between so teams are set for the kick off, this Thursday.

Lets have a look at the make up of this years league.

The Helmand Nighthawks and the Who Dat Nation finished 1-2 in the league last year, and are seated in the same division this year. They don;t have it on their own, as a former Champion, Coach FYC of the Black Cats is in the same division, making the Sub Simmers the hardest division to win.

Over int he Surface Skimmers, the Australian Taipans are the only seeded team from last year, but, The Guns of Hochuli were the dominant team last season - with the exception of the last two games. Making up the trifecta is the best damm team that never shows up, the Drunk Monkeys. This one is a little harder to pick, with the Gunners the clear favorites.

We've set the stage, done the draft, not we're in freee agency, as we settle in for the long haul.

Check back here each Monday Night (USA PST) as we go around the grounds to give you the results, the upsets, and the march to the pinnacle of football, The Subsim Torpedo Bowl.

Gut Wrench 09-12-17 12:22 AM

Taipans Stun The Cats
..and again, Monkeys come Oh So Close

Week One in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and do we have a lot to go over. Relocated games, suspended players, postponed players, one upset and one "oh so close" result that demonstrates just how good a ghost team can be, and begs the question, of "where is their coach now?"

But before we do any of that, let's go to the most important message of the day.

DONATE TO SUBSIM...AND IF YOU CANT DO THAT, DONATE TO HURRICANE IRMA AND NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

On this most solemn of day's "Let's roll".

Even before we got started in Week One, there were changes to be made. The Black Cats were originally scheduled to host the Australian Taipans in their season opener. The Cats under former Champion Coach FYC approached the league and pointed out that Hurricane Irma may impact our game. In the Subsim League, we don't post phone games, we just move their locations and the alternative venue was the Taipans home ground...in Australia. The Cats flew out but the Taipans were without two running backs who missed the return flight. Additionally, the Cats facing some jet lag just didn't show up. Taipans run out convincing winners 127 - 78.

In merry old England, The Helmand Nighthawks as defending Torpedo Bowl champions got to open the season against the Who Dat Nation. The #1 and #2 seeds faced off in a what was expected to be a shoot out, which resulted in a big fizzle. Coach Fuel For Blood started Odell Beckham (WR) who was a game day exclusion, leaving the Nation without their star receiver. The devastation of the loss carried through the team with a middle of the league performance by some of their stars. That includes Tom Brady (QB) who as we know, now graces the cover of a popular game - from which a lot of previous cover players have had woeful seasons after appearing. I'm just saying. Final score, Nighthawks soar 138 - Who Dat Nation 79.

Our Match of the Day this week was the Guns of Hochuli hosting the Drunk Monkeys. On paper, this looked like it would be a landslide victory for the Gunners. The Monkeys are easily the best darn team that never shows up, and this week they almost pulled off the upset of the season by defeating the historically strongest team in the league. Coach Casey (Gunners) team suffered a blow when their star Russell Wilson (QB) failed to perform. The Monkeys countered with an outstanding performance from Drew Brees (QB), but once again, they left a player on the team who was not scheduled to play due to Irma - Mike Evans (WR). That one player, even if they had a poor day, would have scored more points than none at all, and the Gunners had to wait out through Monday Night to make sure the Monkeys defense of Denver didn't show up. The Broncos (Monkeys) put on a fair performance, but they just couldn't put the nail in the coffin. The Guns of Hochuli get one win that they shouldn't have with a narrow victory over the Drunk Monkeys 99.02 - 96.34

So after Week One - where do we stand?

Half the league is 0-1, the other half is 1-0, and Coach Pioneer is asking for the season to end now - it may be his only way of scoring the #1 post season seed.

Next week, we go back across the pond again as the Nighthawks get back to games in the season opener and host the Black Cats. The Cats have been a major player in the Subsim Torpedo Bowl and have historically been a bogey team for the Nighthawks. The Nighthawks can take a one game lead and a sweep of divisional opponents if they can beat the Cats. The Black Cats however need the win to get out of the cellar and tie the divisional leader.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

It's not often that we get to award the opening day award to the same player that won it in the previous year. For the effort of 11 receptions for 182 yards, for a total of 35.2 points points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present the Antonio Brown (WR) of the Australian Taipans, the Week One MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...neerXI/MVT.jpg

Gargamel 09-12-17 06:11 PM

What? The monkies are still in the league? I didn't even sign up this year cause I knew I'd ghost it again.... ah well... time to try and play some this year....

CaptainHaplo 09-13-17 08:18 PM

Don't feel bad. I totally flaked on the draft (not even sure when it was) and am having to "make due" with computer picks. That's ok - we will do what we can with what we have!

Gotta seriously get some more teams and players in next year!

Gargamel 09-13-17 09:58 PM

I didn't even see the signup thread this time...

so does anybody have the link?

Gut Wrench 09-18-17 09:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gargamel (Post 2512408)

so does anybody have the link?


http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/showthread.php?t=232101

Gut Wrench 09-18-17 10:33 PM

Gunners Silenced
...and Monkeys come Oh So Close, Twice

Week Two in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and what a difference a week makes. We'll find out how one team sabotaged the artillery, how one team held their breath all weekend, and how a former champion defeated another former champion.

All this and more that you can read about...including the link that started it all if you care to look.:Kaleun_Periskop:

But before we do any of that, let's go to the most important message of the day.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

Let's start this game with the game that was over the moment that it started.

Oregon. The home opener for the Who Dat Nation. The first year after they traded their franchise quarterback for some no name guy called Tom Brady, the Nation went out to avenge their week one loss. And go out they did, absolutely thumping the Guns of Hochuli into submission. Tom Brady (QB) orchestrated such magnificence, that the ticket sellers ended up refunding those that left after the first quarter when the Nation was already 70 points ahead before the Gunners took the field. The Gunners, historically one of the most articulate and toughest team to beat, were silent as the Nation ran amuck through the Gunners defense (Seattle) This game was over early Sunday and even the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) changed to another channel, but it could have been worst if Who Dat O'dell Beckham (WR) showed up. Who Dat Nation silences the Guns of Hochuli 164 - 84.

Australia. The Australian Taipans learned exactly how long they could hold their breath, while the Drunk Monkeys once again proved that with just a little tweak, they could be a dominating force in the league. The Monkeys, from whom news this week emerged that their coach did not respond to the draft invitation :wah:, drafted the best team in the league and still managed to put up a sizeable total. The Taipans, played from behind all weekend until the last quarter on Sunday night when Aaron Rodgers (QB) shuffled a little pass for a touchdown and gave the Taipans the lead with just two minutes to play in the weekend game. The Taipans get one they probably didn't earn, and the Drunk Monkeys, once again, discover that even with their team, they are so close to being the best darn team in the league. Taipans narrowly get home against the Monkeys 152 - 140.

Our Match of the Day this week was the defending Torpedo Bowl Champions hosting the Black Cats. The Nighthawks, with their Coach away in California soaking up some rays after being suspended mid week for having unauthorized blisters fitted to his feet. Under the Leagues new Anti Doping and Additive Policy, Nighthawks Coach Mister Chris had to serve a two week suspension on the beach in San Diego. Being without their dual Torpedo Bowl champion coach didn't stop the Nighthawks from showing why they are the #1 seed. In a very methodical manner, the Nighthawks ground down the Cats systematically to deliver the Cats their second loss of the year. Nighthawks close out their season opener defeating the Black Cats 116 - 109.

Two weeks into the season and the league is a little fractured. Unlike previous years where we had one team start strong, the upheaval of the Draft Flood has affected the Coaches and produced some interesting combinations.

Both of the international teams are at 2-0 but the Nighthawks are in the stronger position. The Nighthawks have already defeated both of their divisional opponents before they vacate their home stadium Wembley for some other minor football league that's expected next week. The Taipans likewise are 2-0 in their division before they start their away series heading into Carolina.

At 1-1 both the Who Dat Nation and The Guns of Hochuli sit in the middle of the pack, but after the thumping given this week, the Nation are seeded #3 and the Gunners #4. At the bottom of the table are the Black Cats and the Drunk Monkeys - the Monkeys who could quite easily be 2-0.

The draw this year has been adjusted from previous years - we're heading into Week Three and the Taipans have yet to see a divisional opponent. The Gunners after being stunned, get the Helmand Nighthawks flying into town, but it's the Drunk Monkeys home game against the Who Dat Nation that appears, to be the best. The Monkeys have been unfortunate not to win one or both of their first two games, and the Nation gets to show that their aerial accolades of this week, was no fluke. The two teams are evenly matched and if the Drunk Monkeys Coach shows up, this could be one of the best games of the years.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

It was easier to see who soared through the air this week. For the effort of 447 yards, 3 touchdowns and the ever important 9 rushing yards, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Tom Brady (QB) of the Who Dat Nation, the Week Two MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...neerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench 09-25-17 10:47 PM

Record Score
...and cellar dwellers rise.

Week Three in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and we need to go back into the history books. Way back to week 3 in 2015 to find a compatible score. Stand by viewers, you're going to find out about which team broke the double century mark in scoring this week.

But before we do any of that, let's go to the most important message of the day.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

Let's start this game with the game show case the league.

In other games around the world, some sportsman decided to be a distraction to the National anthems. Not in this league, as the Who Dat Nation showed that you can be focused on social equality and still be professional about it. The Drunk Monkeys were hosting their first home game of the season and the Nation came in and absolutely stunned the Monkeys. The Nation set about the systematic demolition of the Drunk Monkeys. They didn't do it in one position, they did it in all positions, with only their defense (Min) and one WR having single digit scores. Conversely, the Drunk Monkeys, while they had a respectable score on the strength of Doug Baldwin (32 pts) it was not enough to overcome a double century score by the Nation. Not since the Black cats two years ago have scored so high, the same year the Black Cats won the league. Will the Who Dat Nation run the table and defeat everyone this year? Only time will tell, but today, time is ticking. The Who Dat Nation blow out the Drunk Monkeys 238 - 125.

The Guns of Hochuli this week hosted the touring Helmand Nighthawks. The Gunners, a former champion and a powerhouse team in the league started the season with one of their poorest performances. Hosting the Nighthawks did not enhance their achievement. Despite starting WR Justin Howard (34 puts), the Gunners were one of two teams this week who started a Defense (Seattle) that generated a negative score. The Nighthawks, after dominating in the first two weeks, may consider themselves lucky that they drew the Gunners this week, as they put up the lowest winning score of all teams. This was magnified when they started both Ezekial Elliott (RB) and Arizona (Def). The Nighthawks should consider themselves lucky the Gunners didn't blow them away, their misfire results in another W for the Nighthawks. Nighthawks get an easy win over the Guns of Hochuli 119 - 100.

I always wonder how far we will go into the season before we get our first Monday Night rewrite. I didn't have to wait very long this year.

Black Cats hosting the Australian Taipans in Carolina. Cats are sitting at the bottom of the table at 0-2, a position that the are unaccustomed to. Taipans are sitting at the top of the table at 2-0 a position that they have had many times, but have not been able to close out the season. Taipans came into town and the Cats just unloaded upon them Thursday night with Carlos Hyde (24 pts). The Taipans didn't help themselves when they became the second team this week to start the London Silly Nannies for -4 points.

https://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net...20100105172343

The Taipns had to come from 100 points back and were hunting down the target when Kirk Cousins (QB) took the field for the Cats. Who expects Kirk Cousins to score 38 points - the Taipans certainly didn't and had to come from behind on Monday night. With just one player left, the Taipans hope of a 3-0 season rested with Dez Bryant (WR) Bryant ended up scoring not enough points for the Taipans to get ahead. The Black Cats narrowly win, thanks to the Taipans Defense (Ravens) 152 - 145.

So what does the table look like a quarter of the way through the season.

The Helmand Nighthawks lead the league at 3-0 and are one game clear of the Who Dat Nation and the Taipans. The Nation's big score this week showed that they came show up and play high scoring football, so they earn the #2 seed. Both the Guns of Hochuli and the Black Cats sit at 1-2, while the Drunk Monkeys remain in the cellar at 0-3.

Next week, we go back to merry old England as the red hot Nighthawks welcome the Australian Taipans on their longest away game of the year. Despite this weeks loos, the Taipans or the Nighthawks can put the entire league on notice with a win and skip away form their opponents.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

This week, our winner originates form the Thursday early game. For the effort of 113 rushing yards, 2 rushing touchdowns, 5 receptions for 36 yard and another touchdown, for a total of 43.90 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Todd Gurley (RB) of the Who Dat Nation, the Week Three MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...neerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench 10-02-17 10:55 PM

Entire Division Wins
...and the other division didn't.

Week Four in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and as it happens each year, we get one entire division that wins all their games, and the other division looses. This year, the entire division scenario happened a little earlier than expected. But before we tell you anything about the losers, make yourself with this important message.
we do any of that, let's go to the most important message of the day.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

On with the carnage.

London. The Helmand Nighthawks are starting to walk away with the league again. Once again, the upstart foreign nationals are showing the local teams just how good you can be at football as a non America. Unfortunately, the Nighthawks were playing the Australian Taipans, who also showed just bad you be at football as a non American. Taipans started the weekend strongly with Aaron Rodgers (QB) leading the way, but the damage was done at the Tight End position. Travis Kelce (Nighthawks) outscored Martellius Bennett 30 - 9. But the Nighthawks can't rest on their laurels. Despite starting Matt Ryan (QB) the Nighthawks left Cam Newton (QB) on the bench where he warmed the bench for 42 points. The bench warmer was not needed as the Nighthawks show the convicts settlement just how the game is played. Nighthawks beat up the Taipans 145-119

Oregon. The Who Dat Nation set a season high score last week and this week and this week the welcomed the Guns of Hochuli to town...and sent them packing. The Nation showed the one team that is arguable the most consistent, just how consistent they can be. Coach Fuel For Blood after the game said "We knew they'd come in firing, heavy blows and lots of noise. We played they tight, returned fire and eventually overran them in the trenches." Ummm, yeah. Who Dat Nation run out convincing winners
153 - 118.

In the Carolina's, the Black Cats were hosting the Drunk Monkeys. The Monkeys have been the hard luck story of the league for a couple of years as they come close game after game to winning. This weekend was no exception with the Black Cats doing just enough to make sure the Monkeys were relegated to yet another loss. The Black Cats did it through the air with Kelvin Benjamin (WR) and on the ground. The Monkeys, well, they just slid on another banana peel and failed to make it home base (Wrong sport?) Black Cats make it a clean sweep of divisional winners by downing the Drunk Monkeys 149 - 127.

A third of the way to the Torpedo Bowl and we have some interesting developments. In the Surface Skimmers Division, the division remains as it was last week. The Taipans sit at 50%, the Gunners sit below 50% and the Drunk Monkeys are yet to score a win. The division is up for grabs.

In the Sub Simmers Division, the picture is a little more cloudy. The Helmand Nighthawks lead both the division and the league at 4-0 and a one game lead over their divisional opponents. The Who Dat Nation sits one game back with the second best record in the league and the division. The Black Cats are another game back making the division the stronger of the two, with a slight edge to the Nighthawks.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

In week four, as we alluded to, this was a rushing week to win games. For the effort of 144 rushing yards, 2 touchdowns, 4 receptions for 42 yards, for a total of 40.60 point, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Levon Bell of the Black Cats, the Week Four MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...neerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench 10-09-17 10:47 PM

Nighthawks Perfect Season Alive
...no so for the Monkeys and Gunners.

Week Five in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, an it's a tale of two ends of the spectrum. At one end, a foreign national team leads the league, while at the other, one cellar dweller and and a former champion battle it out for first pick of the draft

Which teams are we talking about? We'll find out just as soon as we let you know about this.


NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

Week Five, and for the past seven days. I've lived with "that" avatar, Wild Night in Bangkok for 179 posts.

Overseas, the Helmand Nighthawks have already started selling tickets at Wembley Stadium expecting to see a home game. The home side tickets read Nighthawks versus Who Cares. Who cares indeed because this week the Nighthawks completed their fifth straight victory with an easy win over the Drunk Monkeys. The Monkeys didn't help themselves by leaving Drew Brees (QB) Julio Jones (WR) and Denver (DEF) on the starting team, when they were clearly occupied with efforts in Puerto Rico. After the game was broadcast Brees was heard to say "look's like we were sent away to do good, for the Nighthawks." This may be true as the Nighthawks just steamrolled the Drunk Monkeys in what might be a season high winning margin. Nighthawks move to 5-0 with a 147 - 69 victory.

Former champions the Guns of Hochuli have struggled this year to capture the past glory. With just one win to their name this season they rode into town to meet the Black Cats. The Gunners were always facing an uphill battle as no less than two of their players were away on humanitarian duty and two more were bed ridden with the flu.

Said David Johnson (RB) of the Gunner "Achoo, yeah we got sneeze way better if we don't want to vomit all year."

Yeah, thanks for that David. Black Cats get the Gunners in their weakest times 165 - 103.

Our Match of the Week was the Who Dat Nation hosting the Australian Taipans. The Taipans have been leading in the weaker of the two divisions, and the Nation has been unlucky to not have more win. Tom Brady (QB) started early for the Nation giving them an early lead on Thursday, but it was the Taipans consistent across the board scoring in almost every facet of play that saw the Taipans take the Sunday afternoon. Coach Pioneer had no players scheduled for Monday night, but the deficit was too much for both Lativius Murry (RB) and Min (DEF) to overcome. Australian Taipans finish their away series by taking down the Who Dat Nation 159-101 and head home to face their first divisional opponent for the year.

As we edge close to the halfway point of the season, there are three distinct groups of teams in the league. In the first group, the Helmand Nighthawks sit alone at the top of the division and two games clear of the division. In the second group sit three teams. The Who Dat Nation and the Black Cats both sit at 3-3 within the division but the Black Cats holds the tie breaker at this time of the year. The Australian Taipans are the third and lesser team of this threesome (is that what happened in Bangkok?) but the Taipans also hold a two game lead over the division. The remainder of the Surface Skimmers Division make up the third division, with just one game separating the Drunk Monkeys and surprise bottom dwellers the Guns of Hochuli.

Next week we go back to the Carolina's as the Black Cats host the Who Dat Nation in our match of the week. The Cats hold the tiebreaker but in this their second match up, the Nation can level the score and go out to a one game lead. While the outcome won't necessarily change much within the division, the implications on which team is the #3 seed and the easier path to the Torpedo Bowl than the #4 seed could be settled as early as Week 6.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

This week it was hard to pass over this player. For the effort of 355 passing yards and 3 touchdowns, for a total of 36.70 point, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Cam Newton of the Helmand Nighthawks the Week Five MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...neerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench 10-16-17 10:43 PM

The Guns Of Hochuli Boom
...so many injuries for their opponent.

Week Six in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and the league has been shaken up as we near the halfway point of the season. While will have the #1 seed. Who is racing for the #4 and final seed in the Championship bracket. And who just got reamed so badly that they lost their third and fourth picks of the draft in one game?

So many questions, so little time to dwell on the past but before we race to next week, let's get the news of this week, right after this important message.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

Week Six and our Match of the Day was one of the best we've seen in this season. It had everything, a back and forth score line, and an unexpected surge, a resilient run at the end and the anticipation that one of the two teams was just going to miss out. But it wasn't going tot he Who at Nation., The Nation blew into the Carolina's with the goal of being able to stay in lock step with the league leaders, and put their divisional opponent one game down on the tie breaker series. In a high scoring aerial combat, both QB - Deshawn Watson (Black Cats) and Tom Brady (Who Dat Nation) scored and re scored as the game headed towards the the combined 300 point barrier. But it was the age old Larry Fitzgerald (WR) for the Nation that did the damage. Once again, old Larry went for over a yards and a touchdown to sore over 30 individual points and put the Black cats in a hole that were just not able to climb out of. In the highest scoring series of the year, The Who Dat Nation get how and needed every point to do, 162 - 152.

The Drunk Monkeys, bottom the table, were hosting the Helmand Nighthawks, top of the table. The question was never going to be "could the Monkeys stop them?" but "by how much would the Monkeys almost win....again." The Nighthawks wanted none of that and put a formidable team on the ground but faltered. On any other week, the low score by Matt Ryan (QB) would not have been enough to get the win, but when the scare was on, Melvin Gordon (RB) came through and rushed just enough the get the Nighthaks home. Had they been playing anyone else, the perfect season would be over, but, the Nighthawks did just enough to get the W by the skin of their teeth. Nighthawks get one they may not have earned, and once again, the Drunk Monkeys, are just on the verge of getting another win. Nighthawks go home 119 - 105.

In our final game, it was not so much about the Guns of Hochuli getting their season back on track, but how badly the Australian Taipans derailed. In one incident on the field, the Taipan echelon players Aaron Rodgers (QB) and Emmanuel Sanders (WR) tripped over each others ego trying to ham it up in front of the television camera. FEMA emergency services were brought into the ground to tender the bruised egos and both players were airlifted to separate hospitals. Having lost both their QB and #2 receiver, it was always going to be how much the Gunners would run out winners. Guns of Hochuli lower the boom on the Taipans 155 - 122.

So we're looking at the league table and this week has created some interesting potential match ups. The NIghthawks lead the league by two games and are three games away form clinching a play off berth. They can clinch as early as week seven if other games go their way. The Who Dat Nation catapult their way up the ladder with a one game lead of their divisional rivals. And this is where it gets a little more interesting.

The Taipans lead their division by barely one game but are tied with the Black Cats at a 3-3 record. The Guns of Hochuli are one game behind at 2-4 and as it begins to loom, once again, these three teams look to be the players for the final two positions of the Championship Division. None of the three teams have shown any dominance, but there has been a surprise lack luster performance by the Gunners which parallels the yet again injury plagued Taipans. The Black Cats just need to keep on scoring to back door their way into the playoffs.

Next week, we go back to Oregon as the Who Dat Nation gets their chance to draw closer to the league leading Helmand Nighthawks in the match of the week. The Nighthawks can almost begin booking a play off berth with a win against the Nation, while the Nation needs to stop the Nighthawks form running away with the league and the division. Both teams can neither afford a loss with the gaggle of teams squabbling over the minor placings just behind the. It looks to be a cracking good match up at the top of the table.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

It took us six weeks to look beyond the usual stars of the league for the first real surprise for this award. For the effort of 4 sacks, 2 fumble recoveries and 2 return touchdowns, for a total of 20 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present the Baltimore Defense of the Guns of Hochuli the Week Six MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...neerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench 10-23-17 10:58 PM

Thriller in Monkeys Land
...Lions get to keep their record.

Week Seven in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and we're halfway through the season in what is becoming a one division powerhouse and the other division a woeful display. We'll go around the grounds, get the dirt on everything, work out where we are, and set next weeks game so you can do the right thing.

And in order to do the right thing, here's the most important instruction you need today.

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How many breaks does a team need to lead the division. For the second week in a row, the Australian Taipans QB has suffered a broken bone and been knocked out of the game early in the first quarter, leaving the entire team vulnerable to any one who might show up. It would be the week that the Black Cats would need to get their season back on track. Black Cats QB (Kurt Cousins) didn't even need to have a memorable game, he just needed to show up for four quarters, make sure Zac Ertz (TE) reached the inzone once to ensure that the Cats got one of their easiest wins. The Tapans put on a Drunk Monkey display of "how good could they be if they have showed up?" Taipans go in search of their third QB while the Black Cats cruise to a 153 - 118 win.

Drunk Monkeys were keeping an eye on the Taipans game as they went in search of their first win of the season. Hosting the Guns of Hochuli, the Gunners came into town, the once fabled storied franchise who dominated everyone, and just barely got the job done. Gunners QB (Carson Wentz) was able to give the team the lead late on Monday night, but the Monkeys were there the whole way. Jordan Reed (TE) for the Monkeys was able to upset the Gunners machinery late on Monday night and finally bring home a W for the Monkeys, their first of the season. Final score in a thriller, Drunk Monkeys 134.94 defeat the Gunners 133.32.

Our Match of the Week was a top of the table clash with the Who Dat Nations hosting the Helmand Nighthawks,. The Nation were showing up as the clear #2 team in the league but were unable to in a previous match up to get around the Nighthawks. The Nighthawks have been the class of the league, even in those weeks with a diminished score, they have done more than enough to keep the Immaculate Season alive. This week was no exception as the Nighthawks flew in and just handed the Nation a whipping. Lead by their RB Ezekiel Elliott, the Nighthawks out scored the Nation on the ground game. Nation RB Adrian Peterson after the game said "Yeah, I probably should have done more, but at 700 years of age, how many more yards do they think I can get?" Helmand Nighthawks rack up a definitive statement game by defeating the Who Dat Nation 162 - 135.

Week Seven represents the halfway point of the season and there's a couple of things that we know already. Let's take this apart division by division and then team by team.

#1 seed: Helmand Nighthawks. The Nighthawks at 7-0 are 2-0 over their nearest divisional rivals and are within two games of securing home field advantage throughout the divisional play offs. The Immaculate Season is alive as the Nighthawks have already defeated all teams in the other division once.

#2 seed: Who Dat Nation. The Nation are 0-2 against the Helmand Nighthawks this season and have one more match up left int he season. The Nation have to have a little luck go their way if they wish to contest for the #1 seed. Otherwise, the Nation are playing three other teams for the #3 seed and easier path into the Championship Season.

#3 seed: Black Cats. At 4-3 the Cats have the same win/loss record as the Nation and are competing for the #3 seed. The Cats are probably the third of three teams vying for the last play off position. Cats have an easier path in the final weeks of the season which may propel them into the post season.

#4 seed: The Australian Taipans can't help themselves this year as they struggle to behave like a real football team. The Taipans have lead the division for six weeks and have just fallen over in the last few weeks to be a questionable team.

#5 seed: The Guns of Hochuli have been favored by the misfortune of the Taipans and have had opportunities to lead the division. The Gunners hold the divisional tiebreaker with the Taipans but have not yet scored as many points.

#6 seed: At the bottom of the league ladder, the Drunk Monkeys with just one win, there are at least three wins that they could have won had they shown up. The Monkeys are within three games of being eliminated from the post season.

Savage against the Surface Skimmers Division, the league has not yet shown they have enough gumption to take out the Nighthawks.

Next week we go across the pond again as the Helmand Nighthawls host the Black Cats. The Cats coming off a thin win against the injured Taipans stay in the race and are poised to upset the Nighthawks on their largest bye week. This may be the week that the Immaculate Season ends, and we'll be there to cover it.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

Halfway through the season and we finally get a win for the team at the bottom of the ladder. For the effort of 33 yards and 1 touchdown, and -1 rushing yards for 1 touchdown (how on earth did THAT occur) for a total of 28.64 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Drew Brees (QB) of the Drunk Monkeys the Week Seven MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...neerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench 10-30-17 10:39 PM

200+
Nighthawks Secured Play Off Berth

Week Eight in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and we have our first team into the post season. We have a return to form of one of the stalwarts of the fantasy football legacy, and we have a week where one team will have a starting QB without a season ending injury.

But on this evening of preparation for ghastly ghouls and children int he streets, let's just slow down, look twice, and pay attention to the important things that matter.


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England: The Helmand Nighthawks are storming into the season with their 7-0 record, getting ready to host the trans Atlantic pussy's. The Black Cats strut into town, tail in the air, smelling of cat nip, and got scared out of their paws. The Nighthawks showed that they too can put up double century numbers as they just ran riot over the Black cats. The Black Cats, benched Deshawn Watson who went down to the minor leagues and scored almost 50 points. At the same time, the Nighthawks proved that their name was no coincidence as they flew through the air on their way to a score north of the 200 hundred mark. This game was over early Sunday morning and it was always going to be how much of a blow out the Nighthawks would win. When the Nighthawks put up 200 points on the score board, statisticians started looking back for the largest win in history. We only had to look back to week three to discover that the Who Dat Nation had a 113 point win. The Nighthawks went "ham'" (Can I say that on Subsim?) over the Black Cats just pummeling them into oblivion with a 218 - 117 point win over the Black Cats. The Nighthawks come up just 3 points short of a record win.

Our best Match of the Weekend was the previously mentioned Who Dat Nation hosting the Guns of Hochuli. The Nation has been the clear #2 team in the league as they were looking to not drop back further from league and divisional leader the Helmand Nighthawks. Someone forgot to tell the Gunners that plan as they rolled into Oregon, licking their win after a devastating loss last week to the Drunk Monkeys. The Who Dat Nation forgot to show up, as their best point scorer was Mark Ingram (RB) who had two lost fumbles. The Gunners, chasing their divisional leader, needed to make a statement a week after being in the doghouse and did so with double digit scores bu all offensive players. Melodically, systematically, the Guns of Hochuli fired off barrage after barrage to shot holes in the Nations game plan and put them into a divisional hole. Guns of Hochuli get back on the winning page as they forged ahead and outscore the Who Dat Nation 134-80.

Australia: Across the pacific, playing one day earlier than everyone else, the Drunk Monkeys added to their jet lag woes when they flew into the wrong airport. Scrambling for a connecting flight to make the last 3000m trek across he country, the Monkeys arrived barely in time for the National Anthems (of which no body knelt for) but for the Monkeys could have been their only respite., In a low scoring game, the Taipans managed to keep the clock ticking over against the well rested and injured started roster of the Drunk Monkeys. This was not going to be a high scoring game, but after the last three weeks where the Taipans have lost three starters to season ending injuries a W is a W anyway you can get it. Taipans stop the slide and get to .500% with a 105 - 72 win over the Monkeys.

Having arrived at Week Eight, our post season match ups are already starting to take shape.

Helmand Nighthawks: The win by the Nighthawks and the loss by the Who Dat Nations assures the Nighthawks a play off berth. The Nighthawks can secure themselves the #1 berth with a win against any team in the next six weeks. The Nighthawks play three games against the Drunk Monkeys in the second half of the season, so we'll just go ahead and give the Nighthakws the Divisional Title and the #1 seed now.

#2 seed. The Nighthawks are with in one game of the securing the top seeding, leaving the #2 seed open for the winner of the Surface Skimmers Division. The Australian Taipans currently lead the Division but not by any convincing means. The Guns of Hochuli sit within one game of the Taipans. It's quite possible that only one of these two teams will make it into the playoffs, the other relegated to the stands to watch the game. Too close to call at this time.

#3 and #4: With the divisional title of the Sub Skimmers almost wrapped up, the Who Dat Nation and the Black Cats are playing for a path to the finals. The easier path for these teams into the Championship game is through the #2 seed, probably the Taipans or the Guns of Hochuli. The #4 seed will have to travel to England where the Nighthawks are looking for an immaculate season. Also, too close to call.

#6 seed: At the bottom of the league ladder, the Drunk Monkeys are within two games of being eliminated from the post season.

Next week come back to Carolina as the Black Cats host the Guns of Hochuli. Both teams are playing from the disadvantaged position of one game behind their divisional opponent. With both teams having their divisional opponent meet in another game, a win in this match up could propel them into the preferred #2 or #3 position. This game has implications in the shuffle for the minor placings in the post season match ups.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

records are made and it is hard to look past the season highest point scorer. For the effort of 8 receptions, 224 yards receiving and 1 touchdown, for a total of 42.4 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Deandre Hopkins (WR) of the Helmand Nighthawks the Week Eight MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...neerXI/MVT.jpg


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